August 26, 2014 (backdated for educational purposes)
Let Go or Be Dragged ~ Zen Proverb
The kids went back to school full time on Monday August 25, 2014 and I made the most of it. I vacuumed the top floor and did two loads of laundry. I started on my business plan and paid bills. I had a full day of work, and by the end of the day, felt that I had nothing to show for it.
By 8:00 p.m., I was ready for bed because I was exhausted.
Does this happen to you? If you’re human, it probably not only happens to you, it probably happens more often than you like.
Lately for me, I’ve been struggling ALOT and it’s unlike me. It’s actually quite frustrating.
I’m “needy” and that feels really stupid. I jokingly say that I need a patron (someone to give me money freely because they adore me) and a minion (someone who adores me and does every task that I need done.)
Crystal clearly, I see my own lack of work ethic and realize that I’ve gotten to the point of victimizing myself.
It has been slowly building since June, and I’ve concluded what needs fixin’ is: “Being Burned Out.”
I shouldn’t be shocked (though I am). I’ve been working at FULL TILT for over a year: growing my business, speaking to large audiences, setting records at powerlifting competitions, and performing short form improv at the Comedy Spot. Did I mention that I’m also still raising a family that has a lot of moving parts?
And, guess what?!?
Because of that emotional baggage, I weigh 140.5 lbs and holding…even when watching every single carb that goes into my mouth. My stressors are way up and my weight is too. OMG !
Ha! So you see, those of you who think most things are easy for me…it’s not! I struggle too.
As the week has progressed, I realize that I need to heed my own advice from a zen proverb: “LET GO OR BE DRAGGED”
I’m still in the process of figuring out: “know when to hold ‘em and know when to fold them”, but have come to the conclusion that it’s time to reinvent myself.
And, that SCARES me because, like most people, I DON’T LIKE CHANGE. Yet in life, change is inevitable and necessary for growth.
One area where I see room for change is my fitness goals. I realize that doing powerlifting in my current state is breaking my body down too much (with all the other stressors) and this would be a great time to try my “Amuse-ical™ Workout” so that I can walk in my client’s shoes and prove that my workout system works.
Today, I took a step in the right direction for a potential change. I “manned up” and did the difficult job of telling my beloved powerlifting coach that I may be out for 100% RAW Worlds in October.
Apparently, I have two weeks to make my decision and only time will tell…